spanking for headspace

i seem to be back to myself, which is always a good thing. i was just sitting here thinking about getting a good spanking from Ru...... I had these crazy dreams last night, woke up sweating and panting and in quite the excited state. i had several of them involving various scenarios of Ru and his implements and my bare bottom..... and well as other scenes of passionate, heavy sex.... i guess we can all tell what i need....LOL. as i was reminiscing of my dreams and desires, i started thinking about headspace. Last week i was in such a state. i was very down, very lonely. i desperately needed something to take my mind off of the woes of work and my other RL issues.... i knew that, but i was not in the frame of mind to come up with something. So now that i am back to my self, and after my oh so wonderful, yet frustrating, dreams, i wonder if a nice spanking would not have been the perfect thing...... Of course, if Ru and i were not so far away from each other, i do not believe i would have been so down. Grumpy and bitchy, probably.......and my guess is Ru would have found an opportunity to help me work that out were he here. I have read on Bonnie's site, My Bottom Smarts, that sometimes a good spanking is just the thing for frustration. I am here to say i agree with that, although i have never had one just for that reason. i can say that after i usually do feel better, less anxious so i can so see how it would be a great stress reliever. but what about for being down? for me, i get down b/c i feel like everything is crashing in on me at once and i get overwhelmed with life. i am generally a good person and would never intentionally hurt another soul so when ppl do that to me, i have a hard time understanding why; i mean that is just not in my nature. so anyway, that is really how it began. i was down abt Ru not being here and my x decided to pull some schenanigans and then everything just cascaded from there. i realize now it would have been really great to feel that nice submissive feeling i had before.....the one where i felt like i did not have to carry the weight of the world all by myself (visitor). it has really only happened the one time, but i think in that state of mind it would not have been hard to achieve. i think it would have helped me get out of the dark headspace i was in. Of course this is just all speculation. Anyone out there experienced this? i would really like to know if you have and if it helped at all to get a good spanking, from someone you love and trust, when you are feeling overwhelmed and maybe a bit down....in a general funk.

So, as i said, i seam to be back in my normal head space and as randy as ever. i am deffinatley in need of a nice warm bottom.....I do believe Ru agrees as he has been teasing me all day about how much i need one and how he cannot wait to help me out with that. it very wonderful when we are on the same wavelength, in the same headspace, which is most of the time. So i get to see him next week and i am SOOOOOOO excited!! I get to spend the weekend with him too; that was an unexpected bonus.......and i do like a good bonus. see you monday hun!

Need

it is hard being separated, esp after so much time together. i cannot seem to get back to myself since he left. the chaos of work, and other personal issues in my life do not help. everything seems so much worse than it really is, maybe b/c i feel, in a way, i am facing it alone. i know i am not, that Ru is always there to support me and listen and advise, but it is still hard when i cannot feel his gentle touch, his sweet embrace.....sit in his lap the way i always do. ..... there is just something abt the physical that helps reinforce the idea and feelings of support. it makes me feel weak to think this way, but Ru has awakened a part of me that never existed before. the part that feels the need of others and i can admit that, for the first time ever.....that i need others (esp RU). i have never been a loner per say, but i have always been very comfortable being alone. the closer i get to Ru, the less i enjoy my own company.....don't get me wrong, i can crack my self up, but i would rather us be together and share the jokes, the shows, the tears......what ever it is......to share. It seems these days no matter what i do i feel like something is missing, some one to share with. is it a weakness to feel the need of someone else? this is a new thing for me in my adult life and i think i am having a bit of trouble processing it.......

our vacation

i know it has been a while since i posted anything, but i wanted to post about our vacation. we had a wonderful time, saw a great band and had some quality time enjoying the sun and each other. we ate a lot, we drank a lot, we had a lot of sex and some nice spank time! For me, just being together for that long was the best part. We usually only get 3-4 days at a time which is never enough. it is hard to cram weeks into such a short time period. i will tell you about some highlights, discoveries and my favorite spanking while on vacation.

Highlights:

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  Toy shopping - yes, we went toy shopping. Neither of us had ever been in a real "adult" store before. We knew what we were looking for but had to go to 3 or 4 before we found it. We had so much fun looking and giggling though, it was a very nice experience. Of course, if you look back at Ru's posts you will see what was purchased. I wore a nice, very short blue jean skirt for the occasion and, as promised, when we got home from dinner i got well acquainted with Ru's ottoman and our new paddle. :)


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  Picnic - on our last day we had a picnic. the day before we had gone to a local winery and picked up a new wine tote and a wonderful cheese ball mix. well, i made the cheese ball and some other snacks and we packed a bottle of wine and headed out for our picnic. Ru, being the romantic that he is, wanted to go some place very special and new for our picnic, but as time was short we opted for a spot by the water that was very close. it was great fun. just sitting, talking, sharing. it was one of my favorite moments.

Discoveries:

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  Bora Bora - i discovered that if we won the lottery, i would run away with Ru to Bora Bora. No second guessing, i would do it and leave all of this behind. of all the people i have ever known, i believe he is the only one i could spend all my time with and not be dreadfully bored. it was a nice discovery.


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  implements - let's see, this trip i was familiarized with the new leather paddle - i liked it - the hairbrush - owie, that sucker packs a punch - the yardstick - i liked it too, for some reason it makes me giggle. Not the best reaction when your bottom is sticking up in the air and someone is smacking you with one.......


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  Fear - there is not much i am truly afraid of. i am a strong independent woman. i fend for myself and have always taken care of myself. every time i try and let someone else take care of me, it is a disaster. i do not know why this is. i have discovered in recent days that i am afraid to loose Ru ...... this is unsettling to me in a way but reinforces my feelings for him. we have much in our way before we can truly be together the way we want to be.....time, distance, careers, family....... one cannot see the future thus there is always doubt.

Spanking

ok, so the ottoman was nice, erotic, but it was not my favorite while we were on vacation. there was another........

Some background.....Ru has this thing about wanting to make sure i am "in the mood". i am almost always in the mood, and if i am not it is either b/c i do not feel well, or i am in a bad mood.....if in a bad mood though, that may be just what i need anyway! but i digress.....so, i wanted to surprise him one day....difficult as we are always together there is not much time to set up. So anyway, Ru was taking me out to a club to go dancing and my shoes were in the car....i saw my opportunity to get him out of my way for a few precious moments.....so i got my "out fit" ready (an orange t shirt and some thigh high socks with orange and yellow stripes at the top and orange undies) and then asked him to go get my shoes out of the car. i changed quick fast in a hurry, grabbed the yard stick - yes, its origins were on vacation.....not sure how it ended up in the corner at my apartment...hehehehe.....the paddle and bent myself over the kitchen table so Ru would have a lovely view of my posterior when he walked back through the door. he thought i was up to something, so he was not as surprised as i would have liked, but he was surprised enough, and pleasantly so. i got VERY familiar with the yard stick. also, he did not hold back as much as he usually does, which i enjoyed. at the end, after the yard stick, the paddle, the brush and his hand......when i thought it was over or almost over, he said, can you take 20 more? i said yes. he said, ok, choose your implement and smacked me with each of the forementioned devices. Now, my bottom was pretty hot and sore by this time, so i chose the hand as it packed less of a sting. So, my Ru says ok, hairbrush it is! Thanks babe......it was pretty funny. he only smacked me twice (i think) with the brush and a few times with the yard stick and finished up with his hand ....... and believe me i was keeping count of every lick. then he kissed me and hugged me and lead me to the bedroom where we had amazing sex, i got a good rub, then we got dressed and went dancing. great night.

Something Unexpected

The day after i got home, Ru found out he did not have to go to the office so he came and stayed with me instead. We were together for 2 weeks. it was wonderful. But it was very hard for me on Friday when i knew he had to leave the next day. i was in a very dark mood. it is hard now when we seperate and it get's harder every time; but other than friday night, we had a wonderful 2 weeks together. Ru, thanks for always being there for me and for being such great parnter. I love u.

Convenient Household Items

So LU and I were enjoying each others company and playing around, just flirting with each other, when she proceeds to bend over a stool and tease me that she wanted to be spanked. Well I am just not one to let my woman down, so I quickly look around the room for something interesting to “play with” and in the corner of the room I see a yard stick. Oh my….this must be fate! Well I must say that this new discovery was most enjoyable for us both. What started out as flirting turned in to some quality spank time. Yard stick baby! If you don’t have one….get one!

The thing that really made me chuckle was what was written on it….some real estate agent advertisement (I think) that said “Talk to Lucy”. A quick drop of the “cy” and I was in business. Anyway, I just thought I would share with you fine folks. This is what LU has in store when she walks in tonight.

Have a great weekend……I know ours will start out very well!

New Toys

LU and I went toy shopping while on vacation. More to say about this later. Here is one of them... Hope you are having as good of a labor day as LU and I are.